Pulaski A DASH of MOONLIGHTING and a soupcon of GARRY SHANDLING stirred together then strained with Auntie cost-cutting relish. THE GREAT and the good settle down in a beige-toned boudoir set to ruminate upon the small screen highlights of the last seven days. Baghdad "I NEVER seem to get it! Glen Michael's Cavalcade CUT-PRICE CALEDONIAN distant forerunner of ROLF HARRIS CARTOON TIME, only without giant pieces of plain paper, fat marker pens and earnest insights into Disney studio wizardry. Belle and Sebastian ORIGINAL LIVE ACTION version of this Alpen-yawn business saw eight-year-old Seb tame mysterious beast of the mountains. Kids from Degrassi Street, The/Degrassi Junior High CANADIAN SOAPERY that became a regular Children's BBC post-school distraction. Journey to the Unknown BANKROLLED BY 20th Century Fox, this forerunner of the self-same's HOUSE OF HORROR made-for-telly tall tales had the works. Big Breadwinner Hog BLUDGEONING BASTARD gangland bastard business. I arranged a quick chat to find out Moses, ThreeWeeks, 18th August 2022. Fisherman's Friends: One and All (2022. Superted ROTTEN BADLY-DRAWN romp. Thirty stories high. Hitman QUITE POSSIBLY the dullest quiz show of all time. Blackeyes PERVY OLD MAN WHO looks like Dennis Potter but isn't, but actually is, pervs over GINA BELLMAN's breasts. Tales from Fat Tulip's Garden/Fat Tulip Too WOP!
Kids From 47A, The REDOUBTABLE KIDS sitcom from the keep-smiling-through school of jokery. CHiPs WELCOME TO SATURDAY lunchtime. HEYLAND starred as stupidly named "zoo vet" practicing in 1960s backwater of Britain where no-one had seen an elephant before. MINIMALIST single rising tone theme heralded start of this minimalist hands-only-visible chemistry show. Wish You Were Here…? Teddy Edward UBER-RUDIMENTARY INFORMATHON dressed up as the adventures of a medallion-toting bear. One and all review flavourless reheat of factory-made britcom uk. Laura and Disorder NEVER SAW this one coming. Chish'n'Fips More weirdness from that mid-'80s period when CITV tried to steal a march on its freshly-Broom-Cupboarded-up rival by commissioning the first thing that came into the various regional studios' heads. Dimension of Fear ALIEN DIMENSION terrorises sleepy rural village via a secret space research lab. Planet of the Apes FRIPPERSOME FRANCHISE extension of the films. Baggy Pants and the Nitwits ANOTHER OF those cartoon double-bill "sandwiches" that spread like, indeed, nits during the 1970s. Fisherman's Friends: One and All is now playing in 1 cinema in the United Kingdom. He's Pasquale, I'm Walsh DOUBLE JEOPARDY and no fucking mistake. Anything We Can Do… DRAMATISED VERSION of THE GOOD LIFE with home computers.
Quick Before They Catch Us RAMBLING SATURDAY ramble through laughably watered-down Swinging Sixties. Rachel and the Roarettes LESBIONIC BIKER gang hold up a wedding ceremony, then turn up in 1700s period costume to do an opera. One and all review flavourless reheat of factory-made britcom of the 1990s. Astronauts THREE ASTRONAUTS live in first-ever all-British space station, interrupted in their musings by US ground control boss called Beadle. New Faces SHODDINESS INCARNATE made bearable by the gantry of gripe that was the "celebrity panel". Book Tower, The READING-IS-FUN ENDEAVOUR which wasn't set in a tower and didn't show many books.
Quark SPACE NONSENSE about an intergalactic dustman. THAT EXCLAMATION MARK says it all. Owl Service, The FOWL PLAY from the North. Front Line, The "MALCOLM AND SHELDON, dem fight like puss and dog, " explained EDDY "ELECTRIC AVENUE" GRANT'S reggae theme tune to ethnic-com from the pen of Alex Shearer. One and all review flavourless reheat of factory-made britcom international. Loner, The THREE PLAYLETS courtesy of ALAN "COALHOUSE DOOR" PLATER. Pink Panther Show, The LET'S GET the order right here. Little World of Don Camillo, The COMICAL ITALIANO whimsy with red faces and ladles of pasta much in evidence. Nearest and Dearest GRANADA'S BIGGEST-SELLING situation comedy. Flintstones, The MONOLITHIC CORNERSTONE of Hanna/Barbera cartoon empire documenting "page right out of history" antics of Stone Age Flintstone clan.
Murder in Space "WATCH CAREFULLY, " intoned ANNEKA RICE. Porterhouse Blue ALL-IN academic decadence satire-cum-farce (sat-arce? ) Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy, The In a nutshell: Douglas Adams's visionary mix of 2001, PG Wodehouse and a physics A-level paper compiled by Stanley Unwin gets totally screwed in translation. O'SULLIVAN gets bored of lying ABOUT THE HOUSE and opens a restaurant with TESSA WYATT. Ascent of Man, The A COUPLE of billion years squashed into 13 episodes and a cross-hatched jacket with leather elbow patches. Not So Much a Programme, More a Way of Life FROSTIE'S SECOND coming after the Beeb axed TW3. Comic Relief LAUNCHED ON Christmas Day 1985 by NOEL EDMONDS. Punky Brewster IS THERE room in your cold, mean old heart for an adorable lost little girl and her dog? Mr Merlin DOTTY OVER-THE-HILL eponymous medieval meddler BARNARD HUGHES helps/hinders dopey teen CLARK BRANDON in meddlesome sitcommery ways. FALLING BETWEEN old school, black-and-white HEY PRESTO – IT'S ROLF! Bless Me Father DEMOBBED BEFROCKED ARTHUR LOWE patrols 1950s London parish of St. Jude's as wise-cracking Father Charles Duddleswell. Secret Squirrel SUPPOSED JAMES BOND pastiche, but if so, why was the eponymous squirrel dressed in Clouseau getup?
Spy Force SECOND WORLD war adventures of a bunch of characters played by actors who seemed to star in every other Australian film and television drama at the time. Peter Cook & Co ONE-OFF "COMEBACK" for posh whiskery waster, aided and abetted by others, which flopped. Remembered your password? Tales of the Riverbank JOHNNY MORRIS was on hand with his repertoire of two animal voices for this highly suspect real animal story. Magic Roundabout, The FINEST FRENCH export since Pasteurisation.
Farmhouse Kitchen NOT TO BE confused with the indoors-outdoors KITCHEN GARDEN. Glums, The APTLY-TITLED SUNDAY evening miserycom, reworking bits of Take It From Here off of the radio. Kate and Ted's Show WHAT RICHES lie ahead of us. Phoenix Five MORE UNWANTED flotsam washed up from Down Under. Benny Hill Show, The MORE FAMOUS than the Queen in the US. Adventure Weekly DIMLY-RECALLED KIDS series from the arse-end of the 60s about a group of kids in an English town who decided to write up their weekly adventures as a newspaper. Top Hat Rabbits, The SHORT ANIMATED series of Czech extraction. First Post PLAYGROUP POINTS OF VIEW. Englishman's Castle, An KENNETH MORE is ageing harassed scriptwriter living in alternative England 30 years after successful Nazi conquest. Night Network TYPICALLY 1980s WEEKEND FLAGSHIP overnight showcase. Angels MEDICAL MARATHON. One Day in the Life of Television THE BRITISH Film Institute's attempt to get a snapshot of What We Watch, and an absolutely stunning one at that.
Sporting Chance INCREDIBLY POPULAR at the time, virtually forgotten now. Fraggle Rock MEDIOCRE MUPPET goings-on with cavorting mythology well to the fore. MOANING YORKSHIRE clan the Brandons. Wally Gator EARLY, UNDISTINGUISHED effort from Bill and Joe. Quoth Terence of Wogan every morning on Radio 2 for years, and who could blame him? Valerie BOTTOM HOLE arse-for-the-money drabcom. Zoo Time SHORT-TROUSERED LOOK-AT-THIS be-caged business. New Statesman, The RIK "I WAS PAUL SQUIRES! "
Little Armadillos LOW-KEY LARKERY in pretend London nightspot the Seal Club. Gus Honeybun FIVE MINUTE FLEABAG originally on Westward then the channel that sank it. Bob, do you know what a folly is? Persuaders!, The TWO "HILARIOUSLY" (hence the exclamation mark) mismatched crimefighters. Cold Warrior Here's the urbane MICHAEL DENISON as the urbane Captain Aubrey Percival, former Naval officer turned spook being run by CALLAN-esque mean bastard and having to rig up right nasty bits of business.
Wildtrack MANY A first viewing of MIDNIGHT COWBOY's Florida daydream sequence will have been ruined by childhood exposure to TONY SOPER's Britnature miscellany. Creepy Crawlies STOPMOTIONARY INSECT effort from Cosgrove-Hall with Ariadne the spider, a snail called Mr. Harrison and other pests. Life Without George EPONYMOUS, ER, man buggers off from CAROL ROYLE (as made plain in wistful opening titles). Rings on Their Fingers DIANE KEEN and MARTIN JARVIS are a clean-cut coupla young aw-gee-shucks-now lovebirds for whom nuptials are on the cards. Langley Bottom THE SAINTED BERNARD CRIBBINS took the reins for this short-lived rural rumpus. Alfie Atkins SWEDISH ADVENTURES of a bald cartoon boy and his bald cartoon dad. TONY "WILDTRACK" SOPER was your host for "BIRD". Screen Test Memory-test quizzery in old-fashioned ties-for-the-boys, sit-up-straight, desks 'n' buzzers extravaganza.
Well yes, I do, and as a matter of fact, I'm enjoying it! Sir Yellow LEGENDARY UNSALVAGEABLE sitcom disaster which for a long time held the record for fastest "schedule shunt": from 7pm on a Friday for episode one to 12. Simon in the Land of Chalk Drawings BOG-STANDARD CARTOON kid makes with the "special" chalk to create a magical black-background world of his own. Seaview YVETTE FIELDING'S most notable hour before coming clean about her Brave Skin Condition. Tripods, The AS DEREK Griffiths sang in LOOK AND READ's The Boy From Space, "space goes on… forever. " Queen, The Regal communique from Commonwealth-manufactured mahogany writing bureau doubling as traditional televised post-prandial leg stretch/retire to the other room interlude. Flight of the Condor ANDESCENTRIC NATURETHON known for much footage of eponymous bird and those two-foot purple centipedes, besides introducing dreaded 80s parping panpipe fad. Play Chess IT'S THE CHRISTMAS HOLIDAYS, school's out… so why not draw the curtains so there's no light on the telly and tune in to PLAY CHESS?